Clinton is in a weird position -- hated by the left for her support of the war, hated by the right for ... well, for being Clinton. The senator from New York is ripe for a fall. In fact, the only person who can completely understand Clinton's precarious position is the Republican's conventional-wisdom candidate, John McCain. Loathed on the left for his support of a troop surge, he's equally hated by the lock-step right for his occasionally less-than-obsequious positions.

Both Clinton and McCain are goliaths awaiting only the properly aimed rock of David. In Clinton's case, it's almost assuredly Obama. I've stated my own personal like of Dennis Kucinich, and even written a blog entry supporting him, but let's face it, The Little Big Man, the Ohio Gnome, the Man I Love to Give Nicknames To, doesn't stand a devil's chance in heaven.

Sorry, Denny. You were too good for this world.

No, Barack Obama is the real deal. He's got the media-darling status, he's got the cash, he's got the insider backing and he's actually a damn fine candidate -- at least according to my own political beliefs. Yeah, in the end, he's the one to upset Hillary and grab the big brass ring.

Sen. Barack Obama, alleged 2008 Democratic presidential nominee

Meanwhile, over on the right, I've already explained how John McCain has the same sure-fire likelihood of being upset as Hillary. But who's gonna do it? Surely not the No. 2 and occasionally No. 1 guy in the polls, Rudy Giuliani. A pro-choice, pro-gay rights Republican isn't likely to escape the primaries on top, especially with the amount of ethical baggage Giuliani totes around like a Bernie Kerik on his back.

No, the GOP will put its faith in Mike Huckabee. It's all over but the crying. Huckabee, a minister, has the religious creds that Christian conservatives love. But unlike their other possible candidate, Sen. Sam Brownshirt, Huckabee doesn't come off as some sort of batshit-insane fundie zealot, allowing him to haul in more-moderate votes as well. Moreover, his I-lost-100-pounds inspirational story is just the sort of pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps tale that GOP voters love, though the more rational among them will, like me, question how Huckabee's weight loss in any way qualifies him to be president of the United States.

Gov. Mike Huckabee, alleged 2008 Republican presidential nominee

Ah, "qualifies." There's that experience angle that you'll be hearing a lot in the upcoming year. They'll especially be using it against Obama, pointing out that he has little experience -- certainly not enough to be president, they'll say. To that, I say two things:

1. He has as much experience as John Edwards had in 2004, and no one called it into question then.

2. The Bush administration has included either officially or on a consultative basis: Dick Cheney, Don Rumsfeld, James Baker, Henry Kissinger ... in other words, the most experienced American statesmen alive today. And they have fucked us all.

So the hell with experience, ace. And, sad to say, the hell with the Ohio Gnome. He was a passing fancy. The year 2008 is either the year of Mike Huckabee or the year of Barack Obama, and I'll be damned if another religio-crazy occupies the White House. Obama may be a man of faith, but it's the sort of ecumenical faith that characterized the lives of people like Dr. Martin Luther King. Not the quasi-sane faith of Christian supremacists like R. J. Rushdoony. We've had enough of their kind over the last decade, ace. Another eight years of that business, and you'll be recalling the good old days when it was legal to not pray in school. Oh, scratch that. You'll be recalling the good old days when we had public education.

So get on the Obama bus, ace. It's our only hope.