This is, apparently, as good as it gets
Money Magazine released its list of the Top 50 jobs in the country today. I've always assumed that, somewhere out there, in other fields, there were people who brought their pets to work, got paid scads of cash, received daily massages at the onsite company spa, and so on. But no. Among the Top 50, "editor" came in at 19, and "writer" came in at 25. Given that my job combines aspects of both, it's a safe bet that my position is around the 22nd best job in America. At first blush, you would think this is a good thing. But I am young yet, at the beginning of my career, and so I must wonder -- is this as good as it gets?
Hell, a lot of obviously great jobs didn't make the Top 50. Where are the racecar drivers? The heiresses? The fashion designers? The models, for that matter? Not to mention congressman, rock star, lottery winner and Jessica Simpson.
But back to my own writer/editor position. It seems I'm screwed coming and going. Because not only is this as good as it gets, I'm obviously not getting paid a decent wage either. The average pay, including bonuses (Bonuses? Editors get bonuses?! Why was I not informed of this?) comes to $78,242. For writers, it's $60,519. If I average these, as I did the ranking, that comes to $69,380 and change. Now, I'm not going to tell you all just how much I make in a year, but I can tell you it's considerably less than 70 Large. What's up with that? Is my Faulknerian prose not worthy of $70,000/year? I'm asking my boss for a raise -- a big one. Although, given that this blog is published through my company, it was probably stupid of me to say that here. That's probably why I'm not making the big bucks.
Anyway, here's a link to the Top 50 list: Top 50
Note the Top 10: Software Engineer lands at No. 1, with Psychologist and Pharmacist filling out the Top 10. But what really interests me is No. 2, College Professor. See, I think I could do that. I could be a college professor. I have no chance of competently performing any of the other jobs in the top 10, but I could be No. 2. So, maybe I do still have something to hope for. If I just go back to school and get more pieces of paper that say I learned stuff, then maybe I can someday be No. 2. And we can't really hope for more in life than finishing in second place. Even that would be an accomplishment. ... right?
P.S. I just looked over the list again and realized that, in fact, it's not true that I couldn't do any job in the Top 10 other than college professor. I could also do No. 4, Human Resources Manager. But I wouldn't do it long before I would have to pay a visit to No. 10, Psychologist. Who would send me to No. 33, Mental Health Counselor. They would ship me off to No. 9, Pharmacist. And I would eventually wind up in a padded room, with No. 47, Registered Nurse, coming in to change my bed pan everyday.
Dilbert, Software Engineer -- alleged No. 1 Job in the country.